Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Jonnie Love says "Hate the game, not the player."

"Wild and Wonderful"
Charlton Comics
Teen Age Love
Number 81

Wild and Wonderful - two words that no doubt describe As Told To Stan Lee's unofficial mascot, Jonnie Love. Though you will more regularly hear him described as a Bearded Satan, both titles work.

As I wait patiently for another twelve Jonnie Love comics to arrive by mail, I though I would share my last story at hand.

In Wild and Wonderful we once again run into Jonnie Love as he hangs out with kids WAY too young for him.

I believe the cover says it best. "Even though Felicia is Doc's girl, she turns Jonnie on ... and she knows it! Can Jonnie Love resist this temptation?"

I've never known a bearded man that could.

Jonnie Love is nervous. And he should be. One more run in with the law and he might end up being the prettiest girl at the ball. Jonnie knows that his facial hair is like a magnet for the Fuzz but it is also this same skillfully trimmed Vandyke that keeps him swimming in the ladies.

It doesn't take much for Jonnie to outrun the mob of what I must assume are would be rapists, except for precious, precious gasoline.

Pleasure Lake, Jonnie's favorite place.

After the thrilling get away, Felicia, in her excitement , allows Jonnie to get to first base. But this doesn't please the second player in our tale.

Jonnie, instantly appealing to everyone who encounters him, soon hears the sad sorted story that has brought our three players together and though Jonnie's initial instinct is to punch his rival, it always is, he find himself getting involved.

And he knows why.

Of course Felicia is only human, and like all females around this bearded bad boy, she can't help but parade herself around like a large bottomed Gringa on a day trip to Tijuana.

And Jonnie can't help but make one attempt to lose the third wheel.

But, in the end, is forced to make his move with poor Dock watching.

Realizing that Dock doesn't plan to ever leave them alone, Felicia takes matters into her own hands and asks Jonnie to take her home, giving her an opportunity to be manhandled by a real professional.

Before leaving, Dock asks a favor of Jonnie as well.

Jonnie gives his word that he will let Dock's parents know where his is. But with Jonnie, pleasure always comes before business.

But all too soon, Jonnie find himself at the home of Dock Riley to deliver the promised message to his parents.

Dock's parents instantly sucome to Jonnie's charms. Expecially Mrs. Riley who quickly pulls together a meal to send with him when he leaves. Sexual frustration = bagged lunch.

I would wager that there is a steak in there.

That night sleep does not come easily to our hirsute lothario.

The next morning, with Jonnie's incouragement Dock returns to school to explain his absence and, hopefully, get put back on the team. This does not make Felicia happy.

Jonnie, of course, already knows the answer. Jonnie Love has nothing if not a intimate understanding of human nature.

Jonnie Love doesn't do seconds and this makes the best excuse ever to escape.

That was a close call for Jonnie Love, almost too close.


  1. Whoa, that was intense! My favorite part of the story is the panel of Jonnie lying in bed thinking about their kiss. There aren't many stories that show the guy's heartache, so it is a nice change of pace!

    On another note, Jonnie seems really old to me. Did I miss something, or were those other kids in high school?

  2. Jacque: I find that really weird as well. Jonnie is probably (and I'm just guessing here) in his very early 20's... but he always looks so- well, haggard. He totally seems like that guy we've all seen at the dance club. The one who's just a little too old to be hittn' on college girls. Even in that last story where he picks up the mom, he still hooks up with the daughter. And since the mom was 30, how old could her daughter possibly be ?!

  3. Oh yeah, Jonnie is treading on dangerous waters. Or something. He is a little slimy in appearance, but seems like a good guy with good intentions deep down.

    Why was there never a Jonnie Love movie?

  4. Well, at least Jonnie didn't beat the shit out of any hapless, high school boyfriends in this one. In fact, our boy really got his ass handed to him courtesy of the local bombshell. Good for her! And frankly, that "She'll never bring happiness to anyone . . . not even herself" crap is just a loser's sour grapes. Yeah, she looks pretty broken up, driving off in her cute little convertible to see her football captain boyfriend.

    Better go grab yourself a tissue, Jonnie, and whimper yourself to sleep again.

    You got twelve more! Fantastic! More of Jonnie striking out with the ladies, please!

  5. Am I crazy, or is that cover by Neal Adams? It looks a lot like it.

    That one panel with just Johnnie and the football guy feels like it could be the beginning of VERY different story. Just sayin'.

  6. Jacque: Yeah, Jonnie is getting a little too old to be handin’ with the high school kids. I think that parents instantly trust him because he is about their own age.

    There should totally have been a Jonnie Love movie!

    Ghost: It’s funny to me, no matter who the artist is, there always seems to be a least one panel (like the one above where Jonnie is thinking “She’s right ... I’d do almost anything for her!” where Jonnie has a very consistently specific look. As if he was actually based on some guy at the office.

    Mykal: Though I would like to think of Jonnie Love as a subconciously summoned demonic manifestation of hatred, I think he is probably just a creep that preys on girls with low self-esteem. But he had Felicia pegged ALL wrong!

    YES! Twelve more comics. Including one that is identified on the GCBD as Jonnie Love text story/poetry. Could it get any better?!

    Rob!: I have know idea. The cover is just a collage of image pulled from the story but there isn’t any info on the artist for this one. I have not idea why. It would RULE to have a Jonnie Love on your resume.

    And OH MY, Jonnie is a demonstrative man. There are many, many a panel like this one.