Covers of Disappointment

If you read comics you know the bitter sting of disappointment. Be it scooping up that issue of Superman's Girlfriend Lois Lane whose cover, yet again, boasts the much anticipated matrimony of the titular character or all those issues of Batman whose cover's featured the death of Robin. (Well, except for that one time.)

Reading Romance Comics is no different! Bitter "Cover Disappointment" runs rampant. Like a man with a sock down his pants, appearances are not always what they seem.

Today I am going to share with you three prime examples of covers that make you think the inside story is going to totally kick-ass but that, in the sad light of day, is just another loser who doesn't look nearly as much like Cary Grant as you thought he did at last call.

Marvel Comics
Our Love Story
#35
1975

Oh, I know what you are thing, "Quick! To eBay!" but please don't jump the gun here. This good looking cover by John Buscema is like a slap in the face. In "And So We'll Be Married!", an actual "As Told To: Stan Lee" feature, our leading chick IS NOT in love with some yellow jump-suit wearing dork with a red sash tied around his thick middle. Nope! She is only at a Woodstock style hippiefest where the only band shown is too far away to see. There is no "Super Star" infatuation.

"Broken Promise .. Broken Heart!" is right!

DC Comic's
Young Romance
#157
1969

Damn! This looked like a great one. Sad, crying daughter, hussy of a mother both competing for a scarecrow of a man with a white Nehru jacket and, possibly, a black pompadour. But no, this Nick Cardy cover is a complete lie.

The mother is actually a dignafied redhead with a cute bob of a hair cut, an adorable button nose and a pair of respectable flats. The boy in questions, a clean cut blonde whose wardrobe seems to consist of only turtle-necks, v-neck sweaters and slacks.

The pain of this particualer disappointment was acute.

DC Comics
Girls' Romances
#144
1969

If stealing my 15¢ isn't enough, what exactly DOES Nick Cardy need to do to get arrested? Kill a man? Needless to say, in "I Couldn't Be Faithful" Diane COULD actually be faithful. And NEVER does she dance with a young Uncle Sam.

As with any hurts, the pain of disappointment does heal but, as it should, it leaves you a bit jaded.

Remember: Books should be judged by their covers, NOT comics.

Torn From the Pages of REAL LIFE!

Love Isn't in the Cards
for Me!
Marvel Comics
As Narrated To: Stan Lee
Illustrated By: John Buscema, J. Romita, Frank Giacoia
Our Love Story
Number 33
1975

Surely there can be no doubt that Stan Lee was a woman in another life. How else is it that he is able to hit so close to what makes us Girls tick?

As proof of the theory, I present you with "Love isn't in the Cards for Me!" The story of a lonely entrepreneur with wicked eyeliner and the smock of the kindergarten teacher.

In the story we meet Kathy Stewart, the owner of a greeting card shop in the Village. Oddly, this particular greeting card shop is not swarming with single, straight men and our girl is missing the one thing that means more to her than anything, a boy to love.

But one fateful day, while Kathy's friends rub her face in their love, she actually stumbles into Jim, the man of her dreams. A man who seems to be hip to the newest trends in greeting cards. Could there be any doubt that this man was made specifically for her?

Our girl is smitten. She not only agrees go out with him, but she also agrees to order Heartbeat Cards for her store. Remember, they're the wildest!

After what looks to be the date that 15 year old kids have, Kathy is in love but much like real life, this isn't happy ever after.

When Heartbeat Cards ships her an incorrect order, Kathy decides to go to their offices in person only to find out that Jim is actually their top sales person. *SOB*

Kathy is heartbroken. She closes her card shop up for days, sitting in the dark of her apartment crying over a man she's known for as long as it takes a greeting card company to fill a first order. But, finally deciding she can't hide from life, she returns to work only to discover that someone has been running her shop in her absence.

She does not have the same response I would.

In a climax that is not at all weird, Jim, the now former head sales person of Heartbeat Cards has somehow broken into her shop and been running it while she was away.

Wow Kathy! He's a keeper.