Jonnie Love - Will your reign of terror NEVER end?!

"Hour of Despair!"
Charlton Comics
Pencil/Ink by: Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez
Teen-Age Love
Number 86
1972

You all know the type. He lies in wait for girls in anguish. Girls fragile from a recent breakup or other self-esteem destroying experience.

He is the guy who offers ONLY a shoulder to cry on, but it inexplicably goes a little further than planned. He is the someone "accidentally" stumbled across when a pleasant tumble in the sheets might make things feel just a little better. He is the planner. The lurker. Waiting with his closely-trimmed Van Dyke for the opportune time to strike.

He has no decency. He has no moral code, at least not one that says "don't sleep with a drunk girl". He is the REBOUND GUY.

He is Jonnie Love, a man with no shame.

In "Hour of Despair" we once again find Jonnie Love in the market for an easy score and hungry for a medium-rare steak. When he comes across beautiful and fragile Anne Talbot he knows one thing and one thing only, he is going to tap that.

Pulling out one of his signature moves Jonnie Love makes easy work of our despairing young damsel with music pulled from the devil's own playlist.

It takes little more than a quickly composed ballad to gain the trust of the innocent Anne Talbot and soon her whole sorrowful story comes spilling out.

With Anne still crushed by Mitch falling in love with another (something I am sure pained poor Mitch as much as it pained her) Jonnie sees an opportunity to increase Anne's attachment to him and they "accidentally" run into her old flame.

Mitch takes an instant dislike to Jonnie, as so many do, with their jealously of his masterful grooming and intoxicating pheromones. And things soon become violent.

And still on a high from having the bearded Romeo fight for her, Anne finally gives Jonnie a little of what he is after.

A bit of action.



And, after changing into his "getting lucky" clothes, a nice steak.

Just as Jonnie is thinking about splitting the scene and escaping anymore of those "deep conversations" with Anne, her mother has to stick her nose where Jonnie certainly would prefer it wasn't. In his damn business.

But never one to avoid a chance to beat an innocent man or a chance to score with another chick, Jonnie agrees to go.

At the party Mitch is both shocked and a little scared to see that Jonnie is there. That is until Jonnie takes him off his guard with what Mitch takes as a sincere apology.

But as always Jonnie's way is cruel and unexpected.

Truly frightened now, Mitch tells Jonnie he will not try to stop him from taking advantage of poor Anne. But Jonnie doesn't fall for that, he's done this too many time before.

Taking Anne home Jonnie tries for one last kiss before repeating the same false promises he's spoken for so many years, to so many different women. And then it is back on the road.

But, not for the first time, Jonnie has another run in with a mislead protector of the innocent. But this game is an old one to Jonnie Love.

Again Jonnie finds himself pulled back into the drama of Anne Talbot, a drama of which he has had his fill. But Jonnie is nothing if not adaptable, beside, Mrs. Talbot looked like she could use some comforting too.

Will Jonnie Love ever pay for his crimes to humanity?
Find out tomorrow when I bring you
the last chapter in the Jonnie Love saga.

Well-Groomed Beard = Heartache

"Make Room in Your Heart ... For Me!"
Charlton Comics
Teen-Age Love
Number 82
1972

As anyone who has ever had a relationship knows nothing good can come from facial hair.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to say that you should never date someone with a beard, goatee, what-have-you. I'm just saying that if you do, be prepared for it to end badly.

Case in point, in "Make Room in Your Heart ... For Me!" we meet Jonnie Love, a motorcycle riding, high school drop out with only one thing on his mind, stealing Ken Satterlee's girl.

After riding into town on fumes, Jonnie Love needs to find some gasoline. And quick.

But as with all bearded men, trouble is never very far behind.

Ken, obviously recognizing Jonnie's real intentions, does what he can to stop it.

Once Ken is out of the way, if only temporarily, Jonnie Love starts to set his plan into motion. First, by gaining the trust of Gina's father.

Then by seducing Gina with song.

Of course Gina is only human so, with Jonnie's intoxicating combination of a well-groomed beard and his singer songwriter silver tongue, she was his slave.

So his plan was coming together. He had Gina's father duped. And Gina was putty in his hands.

Jonnie Love's diabolical plan was working SO well that Ken Satterlee was forced to make one last desperate attempt to save those he cared about.

For a moment it looked like Ken's split second plan worked. That finally, Jonnie Love was going to end up where all bearded men should end up.

But Ken made a rookie mistake. (One that my own father would kill me if I made.)

Never let people know what your thinking. Especially if the deputy who arrested the innocent man you framed is listening.

So now poor Ken is the one heading to prison. Maybe they'll show "The Godfather" on movie night. (Ken should take notes.)

Without Ken Satterlee to protect them, our story ends the only way it could.

Yet, even knowing how it would end, Gina Regan would do it all again. THAT is the power of the beard.

Ask Spectergirl!

It's Friday so that mean more advice from Spectergirl. Once again I'm here to share with you my vast knowledge of relationships and help give you the keys to a better life. This is very likely the only opportunity you will ever have to become a more likable and well rounded individual, SO best take advantage of it before I grow weary of your trivial problems.

(originally answered incorrectly in Skywald Comic's Tender Love Stories #3)

Dear Sausage Fingers,

Believe it or not, quite often the things we hate most about ourselves actually become some of our favorite features. Remember you're only 13 now but in a few years there will be plenty of men who will appreciate your thick fingered hands. Along with about 10 % of women you'll meet in college. (And that doesn't even include the 8 % that will only claim they do when men are around.)

Until then avoid jewelry and bowling in mixed groups.

Statistically speaking flying is still the safest way to travel.

"No Other Women For Miles"
Charlton Comics
Pencil/Ink by: Art Cappello
Romantic Story
Number 125
1973

I know what you are thinking. You have been burned too many times before. Surely, surely this story could not be as awesome as this cover would lead you to believe.

But oh yes it is! Yes! Finally a fabulous comic book cover that is lame in comparison to the complete awesomeness inside. So let's not delay any longer.

What would you do if you found yourself stranded after the private plane you were flying in crashed? How would you spend those days as you waited to be rescue? Well, let's not get ahead of ourselves.

In "No Other Women For Miles" June Walton is a secretary for the Big 'Z' Corporation. One of several secretaries to the "Genius" behind the company's success.

But Perry McKay knew exactly who she was and he told her breasts as much. Heck, I would have problems not addressing that chest.

But in the whirlwind that IS big business, June is swept way on an impromptu business trip to New York City.

But the unthinkable happens.

In the crash June and Perry come out without a scratch, but the pilot's leg is broken. What a lucky break for our would be lovers! (pun intended) Now they have all the time in the world to wander off together without that stick-in-the-mud Jennings cramping their style. And wandering off is far preferable to listening to Jennings crying "the pain is too much" and "oh God, I can't feel my leg anymore."

So again, we come to our earlier questions. What would you do if you survived a plane crash? How would you spend your days as you waited to be rescue?

Would it include anything like ... long walks?

Skinny dipping?

How about heavy petting?

Of course, leave it to Jennings to try and ruin everyone else's good time.

I'd have a good mind not to answer those pleading cries for help. Of course then our story wouldn't get even greater.

Greater you ask? Yes with a BEAR ATTACK!

Could this be the same bear from "Non' but a Brave" still bitter at having missed his chance to eat two hamburgers and a milkshake, if only secondhand? Well, the same bear or not, we have to assume that bears are to Charlton what buggery is to Vertigo.

But we Charlton readers are here for the romance, so, despite all of Jennings' drama, we still get our happy ending.

l

If only more marriage proposals could be so groovy.

If the David Cassidy pin-up hadn't already sold me, this would have.

Clearly if you're reading romance comics you must be some sort of man-crazy spinster. So here is an activity pages just for you!

Oh, and before you are too hard on any of our lovely ladies, please realize that "Handsome" Harvey is no prize himself.

(Charlton Comics, Time for Love#26)