Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Only Spartan women give birth to real men! - Oh honey, you're preaching to the choir!

So I told my husband I was in the mood to watch a movie where lots of people killed each other.

We ended up snagging a copy of 300.

The movie could have only been a better fit if I had voiced a desire to watch something homoerotic with a bunch of well put together men wearing little more than a Speedo, cape and a strategically applied air brushed tan

Well, at As Told to Stan Lee we are not only all about comics, we are also all about objectification. So today I am bringing you the shirtless men of Romance. (Aaron thought I should try for 300 days of shirtless men but even I would grow bored with that.)

Now gentlemen, before you go slinking off to put on a shirt, remember these are the ideal. No one expects you to look this good.

So, with no further delay, lets get to it!

Secret Romances #17 - Ohh, Captain...

Grabby? No need to apologize.

Sweethearts #123 - Never Trust a Sailor

Though, in my experience, the older sailors are normally covered in tattoos of naked women (unless the women they married made them tattoo bikinis on them) so really it's a draw.

Secret Romances #17 - You Never Can Tell

If Lila could only get these two to get along there would be the makings of one hell of a cruise.

I Love You #102 - With the Swingers

I'm all for public displays of affection but these two are just creepy.

Career Girl Romances #62 - Why Does He Kiss Me - ?

Makes you wonder exactly what kind of pills did this younger Stan Lee send for.

Teen Confessions #83 - Daddy's Little Girl!

Well honey, in that case, you should wear your school uniform from eight grade. - Dad has got to get a clue!

Sweethearts 134 - In The Shadows

I bet he smells of nothing but chlorine and masculinity.

Teen Age Love #86 - Hour of Despair

Jonnie Lve. Do I really need to say anything else?

Sweethearts 134 - Love Ain't Hat

I'm willing to bet she just threw up a little bit.

Teen Age Love #91 - What Must I Do?

Exactly what are either of you doing that in remotely interesting? Let alone wild.

Secret Romance #13 - All or Nothing

Yeah, I'll let you insert your own joke here. I do have standards you know.

Teen Age Love #66 - Another's Arm

See, I would have thought she started the whole thing when she choose to wear body paint in lieu of a swim suit.

Secret Romance 33 - The Love Goddess

Something about Steve's stance make me think that he might not blame Wharton for finding Wendy attractive but he personally just doesn't swing that way.

And I saved my favorite for last.

For Lovers Only 62 - I'll Pay for These Kisses

If I were Martinez and Elier I would have signed it that large as well.

Alright ladies! You can feel free to go back to your unsatisfactory lives and your sub par men.


  1. The physics on display in "Why Does He Kiss Me?" simply baffle me.

    (On a side note: I assume the "quarterly reports" pertained to the uptick of sales for the last issue of Amazing Fantasy.)

    1. I also love how the Sage desk clerk takes the attempted rape of the on sight nurse totally in stride. Talk about being a professional! That is just one of the many reasons that Sage is the preferred hotel for the comics industry.

  2. Spectergirl: One can see from this post the difficulty comic book artists have had drawing chest hair. A couple of these guys have what looks like a small tangle of fishing line on their chests.

    Spectergirl, how can you not see the underlying potential for deviant wildness in the couple from Teenage Love #91? Clearly, the young Aryan has the damsel in the classic law enforcement "elbow grip," thereby assuring docile compliance and submission. Her blank, willing expression speaks volumes. Also, she is carrying a portable transistor radio which, let's face it, means she's easy and up for anything.

    Which reminds me. I think you've missed at least one Tuesday spanking post.

    1. Mykal: I also find the chest hair reminiscent of the angry Charlie Brown hairline.

      Thank you! I totally wanted to say something about the strange little radio the wild chick from What Must I Do was holding but for the life of me I couldn't think of what it should be called! Portable transistor radio has almost a poetic ring to it.

      Yes, I have missed a few spankings. Seems you have unearthed one of my many secrets. I am shit with follow through!